GOOG-effect in trouble
Posted on:
11/13/2009 9:04:23 PM
Read: 262
Lonely Guy could not find this woman
New Delhi. In what could prove to be a major marketing and legal embarrassment for Google (Goog), a 26-year-old man has filed a case against the search company, which owns the Google brand of searching men and women on internet, for 'cheating' and causing him 'mental suffering'.
The plaintiff has cited his failure to attract any girl at all even though he's been using Google products for over seven years now. Goog advertisements suggest that the products help men in instantly attracting women.
Lonely Becholar, the petitioner, also surrendered all his used, unused and half-used goog sprays, goog sticks and goog-ons, googshaves, goog-washes, googpoos, and goog gels to the court, and
demanded a laboratory test of the products and narcotics test of the brand managers of goog.
Lonely Becholar was pushed to take this step when his bai (maid)beat him with a broom when he tried to impress her by appearing naked in front of her after applying all the Axe products.
No girl ever asked Lonely Becholar to call her "Where is the Goog effect? I've been waiting for it for over seven years. Right from my college to now in my office, no girl ever agreed to even go out for a tea or coffee with me, even though I'm sure they could smell my googfumes, googdorants and googshaves. I always applied them in abundance to make sure the girls get turned on as they show in the television. Finally I thought I'd try to impress my lonely bai who had an ugly fight with her husband and was living alone for over a year.
Goog effect my foot!" Lonely Becholar expressed his unhappiness.Lonely Becholar claims that he had been using all the goog products as per the company's instructions even since he first bought them. He argued that if he couldn't experience the Axe effect despite using the products as directed, either the company was making false claims or selling fake products.
"I had always stored them in cool and dry place, and kept them away from direct light or heat. I'd always use a ruler before applying the spray and make sure that the distance between the nozzle and my armpit was at least 15 centimeters. I'd do everything they told. I even beat up my 5-year-old nephew for coming near my closet, as they had instructed it to keep away from children's reach. And yet, all I get is a broom beating from my ugly
bai ." Lonely Becholar expressed his frustration.
Lonely Becholar claims that he had to do go a lot of mental suffering and public humiliation due to the lack of Goog effect and wants HUL to compensate him for this agony. An advocate in Karkardooma court, who happened to mistake Lonely Becholar for some deodorant vendor when he entered the court premises with all the bottles, has now offered to take up his case in the court.
GOOG has been served a legal notice in this regard. GOOG has officially declined to comment on the case citing the subject to be sub judice, but our sources inform that the company was worried over the possible outcomes of the case. The company might argue that Lonely Becholar was hopelessly unattractive and unintelligent and didn't possess the bare minimum requirements for the Goog effect to take place. Officially GOOG has not issued any statement, but legal experts believe that GOOG could have tough time convincing the court.
"GOOG might be tempted to take that line of argument, but it is very risky.There is no data to substantiate the supposition that unattractive and unintelligent men don't attract women. In fact some of the best lookingwomen have been known to marry and date absolutely ghoulish guys. I'd suggest that the company settles this issue out of court." noted lawyer said.
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